Vikings vs Bears: A Completely Unbiased Preview

Mitch Trubisky is a fraud! He’s a dump down Darryl who has taken advantage of some cupcakes, and Cohen can’t bail him out of this one. The hype surrounding the Chicago QB is getting out of hand, and Sunday night he is in for a reality check!

Mitch’s best 3 games have come against some weak competition, Tampa Bay, Miami and Detroit. Those are the only three games that he averaged over 10 yards per attempt on his throws. In the other 7 games, he averaged a very sad 5.43 ypa. You can’t be a check down Charlie against the leagues number one 3rd down defense.

According to PlayerProfile.com, the titty-kissing QB is ranked 23rd in accuracy, and 21st in true passer rating among qualified players. The throwing windows are about to shrink for him, and he is going to have Danielle Hunter, Sheldon Richardson and Everson Griffen breathing down his neck all night long.

The Bears defense is no joke, you can’t argue that. The Vikings offense has a worthy opponent in front of them. But with Thielen, Diggs, Cook and Rudolph the Vikings offense just out-classes the Bear’s offense. I expect things to be interesting, but the Vikings will just be too much in the end.

It’s time to bring Mitch back down to earth, the Vikes will rattle his cage. If Minnesota can continue to stop the run like they have, the game will be on his shoulders. And that weight will crush him like a like an empty soda can. 24-14 Vikings.

JL

Mid-season Reviews. Scariest Teams in the NFL

Boo motherfuckers. Scariest teams in the NFL. LETS GO

1. The Minnesota Vikings. I am in firm believer in playing the best you become the best. Vikings have had hard fought battles with the Rams, Saints, Packers and soon to be Packers again, Bears two more times and the New England Patriots in Foxborough. The defense is coming along very nicely, led by the future Hall of Famer Danielle Hunter(11.5 sacks. leads NFL). Come playoff time, this team will already been tested and be ready to win on the road. PS with Cook back at RB and Diggs healthy again, that offense gonna be NASTY.

2. Seattle Seahawks. Just when you are ready to write off Russell Wilson and the Seahawks Defense, they come out and raddle off a nice litttle spree of solid wins and tough close losses. I am also writing this during the Rams vs Seahawks game and their only down by a feild goal at half so looking very good against one of the ELITES. Rams will likely win the division but could make very solid run for the wild card, if not making the playoffs, they may ruin some teams dreams of the playoffs. Can beat any team in the league.

3. NUMBER 3! The bad boys up in Pittsburgh. Man that offense and GOOOOD! I’ve got them over the Pats and behind the Chiefs in the AFC. Tomlins D, his defense not his penis, is looking hard and tough(insert drool emoji). They can score with anyone right now.

4. Chiefs and Saints. If your gonna be able to beat these teams, gotta have defenses that put pressure on the quarterback and have a really good defense. You need a defense to hold those offenses under 30 and a offense that can score over 30. Those two will be problems,

5. Bears are very good. Matt Nagy might be a better offensive mind than Sean McVay IMO. We will learn a lot about them come next Sunday night vs the Minnesota Vikings. Must watch game!

Not mentioning the Rams because fuck them. Trying to turn the NFL into the NBA? Just getting huge name possible and shit? Politely go fuck yourself sir! Rams are good but they aint winning it. Bad jew jew, can’t play God, Sean McVay!

Patriots look really bad at times. Seen Tom miss throws too much this season. Josh Gordon looks slow at times. Jules is a nut job and needs to stop trying to get CTE every play.

Fuck the Panthers. Redskins suck. Packers are frauds. Chargers might be really good but I feel like we say this every year, over it. Browns are coming along, my upset of the week, stay on high alert when Big Dick Baker walks into your town. Jets trash. Dolphin ish. Cowboys "I’m gagging. Giants DEAD. Can’t think of anymore.

Bottom line, Minnesota Vikings are winning the Superbowl. See you in Atlanta!

Whistlin Willy

Surfin Right Into Your Bookmakers Head. NFL Week 10 Picks. Upsets and Guaranteed Winners

First things first, shout to that cuck, Dennis The Ratty Commentator, this week is for you. May the lord have mercy on on your soul.

As many of you could tell, I’ve kept my picks to myself the last couple weeks. I did this mainly so Dennis, that miserable cuck, wouldn’t have access to my great NFL brain. But I no longer can withhold such information, the people need me! We are printing money here at The Ratty for God’s sake! So let’s get into the picks.

Looking to double you money ASAP? Then do this 4 game Parlay. GUARANTEED WIN

New England Moneyline. Chicago Bears Moneyline. Saints Moneyline. Chargers Moneyline. Guaranteed a quick double in money. All very big favorites as well.

Wanna bet on one game? Here our LOCKS OF THE WEEK

Seahawks are covering the 10 point spread. It is way too big for a divisional game. Seahawks play the Rams better than anyone and there are the hottest team in the NFL right now. That’s a LOCK.

Chicago Bears to cover the 6.5 spread. Lets be honest, the Roar will not be restored anytime soon. The Detroit Lions are trash and that Bears defense will do what Minnesota did last week to the Lions. LOCK.

Saints to cover the 5 point spread. The Bengals lol… PRETENDERS! FRAUDS! They want you to think they’re good, but they are NOT. They suck and will suck! There is just no way they can score with the Saints, especially with AJ Green being out this week. LOCK.

My last two are toss ups, but still feel very confident in them! The Patriots to cover the 7 points against the Titans. The Pats are too good, but if there is anyone team that can surprise the shit out of the Patriots, it is definitely an ex-player or coach of Bill Belichick. Mike Verbal…. tough to see it happening but Matt Patricia did it in week 3.

Then the Browns! They might even win outright this week! They are a lot better than people give them credit for. Wanna gamble a underdog moneyline? Take the Browns over the Falcons. Falcons are frauds, they beat the Redskins last week but lets be honest, the Skinnies SUCK. Yuuuuck. Browns are at home and have a new life playing for the new head coach. So throw a lil nickel and see if you can get a tickle.

So there you have it folks, PPs Picks of the Week! Now get out of here. Go on. Get! Go win some money little PPeepoes!

PS- Fuck you Dennis, your wife is a whore. She fucked Dan and Gary at last years Holiday party.

PP Huncho